


Dancing on My Own

by kbl55429



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe, BAMF Alec, Bisexual Jace, But their not really enemies, F/M, Friends to Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hurt Alec, M/M, They just avoid each other like the plague
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-11-20
Packaged: 2018-12-03 13:14:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11532987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kbl55429/pseuds/kbl55429
Summary: Alec Lightwood is a famous singer.Magnus Bane is a famous actor.They were best friends and came to Hollywood together taking it by storm, doing everything together until a fallout forced them apart.  What happens when an award show brings them in the same room and onto the same stage in two years? Can they mend the hearts that were broken or will they forever be apart.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever fanfiction, I get ideas but I never write them out because I'm not a great writer but I'd figured I'd give it a try. I proofread it a couple of times but I might have missed things. Please let me know what you think and if I should continue. Thanks.

Alexander Lightwood and Magnus Bane have known each other since they were in diapers. Their moms were best friends before them, they grew up together, they were best friends. They encouraged each other, they were there for each other, through the good and through the bad. They were each other's rock, Alec was the first person Magnus told he was bisexual and Magnus was the first person Alec told he was gay. By the time they both turned 23, they were both very successful, Alec being a musician and Magnus being a actor. They had showed up in Hollywood at the ripe age of 18 and had taken it by storm and they were always there by each other's side. Alec had never told anyone but his sister that he was in love with his best friend and by the time they turn 25 everything had came crashing down. Magnus had gotten himself a new girlfriend, up and coming model Camille Belecourt and she did not like Alec and Alec didn't like her. Alec could see the fake ness in her smile and coldness in her eyes but Magnus was so in love with her he couldn't see that she was just using him. 

So here they were at 2 o'clock in the morning with Magnus crying in Alec's arms, Magnus had come home early from filming to find Camille in bed with a Russian heir. Alec had never been more mad in his life, Magnus deserved better but in the end Magnus went back to her and the same thing happened another two times. By the fourth time Alec had had enough. 

“Magnus why do you keep doing this to yourself, this is the fourth time she has done this to you and she'll keep doing this to you until you don't go back anymore.” “Alec, I love her, I don't know what to do.” “I understand that you love her, but she doesn't love you, if she did, she wouldn't keep doing this to you. You have to end things not only for your sanity but for your health.” It was true Magnus knew this, ever since this started happening Magnus had lost weight and he had continuous black bags under his eyes. “Look Magnus, I'll always be here for you but she's using you for your fame, have you notice all the jobs she's been getting lately since she started dating you, I can tell you it's a lot more. I'm only telling you this because I care, you're my best friend and I just want you to be ok. When it's done you can live here until you get back on your feet and I'll help you any way I can.” “You're right, I'm going to go home and pack some things and I'll see you later tonight, maybe we can do our traditional movie night, we haven't done that in awhile.” “I liked that, I'll have everything waiting when you get back,” “what would I do without you Alec, I'll see you in a couple of hours.” With a hug and a smile, Magnus walked out the door, but it wasn't a couple of hours, it was a couple of months. 

It was then Magnus showed up on Alec's doorstep, looking more fresh then he's ever seen him. “Look Alec I'm sorry I haven't contacted you, but I just needed some time to figure everything out.” “Well did you get everything sorted that you needed to?” Alec said with a bitter coldness, ok yes Magnus deserved that. “Yes I did, look why don't you sit down, Alec, Camille and I got married, these-” “you what Magnus,” Alec practically yelled, “after everything she's done to you, you thought the best thing to do was to get married, Magnus have you lost your mind?” 

“Calm down Alec, look I don't need your permission, I just came here to tell you that Camille doesn't want us to hang out for awhile and I owe it to her to try to make this marriage work,” “wait you owe it to her, she's the one that has cheated,” “yes but she cheated because of our relationship,” point between the two of them, “she felt neglected and she lashed out.” 

“So your just going to throw away 25 years of friendship for a woman that has cheated on you four times and those are just the ones that you know of…” “look I'm sorry, but I love her and I have to try and she hasn't cheated in the last two months” “ I'm going to say it again, that you know of.” “ENOUGH Alec, look these last two months have been amazing, when I'm not hanging out with you, and I give her all my attention, she's completely different.”

"So your saying this is my fault?” Magnus didn't say anything, “so I'm going to take your silence as a yes, I can't believe this, I need a drink.” “Alec, don't be like this, it's only for a couple of months.” “keep telling yourself that Magnus” “what do you mean?" “Come on Magnus, don't be so daft, you know what nevermind.” Magnus noticed the blank look on Alec face, he was always able to read him like an open book, now not so much, when did their relationship come to this, it was then in the moment Magnus realized, Alec doesn't like Camille, he never did. “You really don't like her do you,” “what made you think that?” When did Alec become a smartass towards Magnus. Alec realized that Magnus relationship with Camille was ruining their relationship. They never raised their voices towards each other, yeah they would fight but it would never go on like this. They would always come to an understanding and they would end with a tub of ice cream and their favorite movie. But this fight, it felt different like it was the end of things. Alec never thought he would hear what he heard next. 

“You're jealous.” “Please, me jealous of Camille, she a vile human being, she's a manipulative, controlling person who doesn't care about anyone but herself.” “No, that's not what I mean Alec, you're jealous of our relationship, just because you can't get any and are emotionally repressed and have severe daddy issues…” At that Magnus realized he had gone too far, he immediately saw the the hurt in Alec's eyes. Magnus was the one person who never brought up his relationship with his parents. Having kicked Alec out when he came out to them with his father beating him up and Magnus was there to clean up the pieces. He was there to help with the nightmares, the social anxiety, the panic attacks it was how Alec got involved in music in the first place. The main reason they moved out to California. Alec used it as an outlet, a way to show his emotions and to let everything he was feeling out, it was why Alec was revered as one of the greatest musicians of his time, because he was an emotional performer, he put everything he had into a performance, it's why people loved him so much, they could relate.

Fighting back his tears, “GET OUT!” Alec yelled, “I'm sorry Alec I didn't mean it…” “Get out Magnus, please!” Alec was begging now, Alec never begged. With that Magnus left hoping he didn't just ruin his relationship with Alec his best friend, the one person who knew him better then anyone else. What Magnus didn't hear was the glass breaking against the wall and the silent sobs of his former friend. Former because it wouldn't be a couple of months but a couple of years before they saw or spoke to each other again.


	2. 2 Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec has a flashback.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The timeline might be a little off, but I did my best to make it as accurate as possible.

Alec is sitting inside his downtown LA penthouse with his sister Izzy, his best friend Jace, his manager Catarina and his stylist Clary Fray. Tonight's the big night, the Grammys, nominated for 6 of them and he has a huge performance singing his hit song Dancing on My Own. No that's not what he's nervous about, tonight's the night that he'll see his former best friend in two years. In fact he's presenting for Album of the Year which Alec is nominated for, if he were to win, which he wants to so bad, it'll be the first interaction they'd have since that fateful night that tore them apart.

Being pulled out of his thoughts by his sister, “Hey big bro, did you hear anything that we just said?” Clearing his threat, “no I'm sorry, I was lost in deep thought.” “Yeah, no kidding, are you sure you're alright?” “To be honest Iz, I'm not sure, tonight's suppose to be one of the biggest and best nights of my career and all I can think about is, well he who must not be named…” Izzy gave him that name, which when she used it, Alec laughed, a genuine laugh, one he hadn't heard in a long time.

“Hey Al, I know your nervous about having to interact with him, but try not to think about it alright, this is your night, don't let him ruin another thing, and if you were run into him, I'll be right by your side.” Looking at his friend, “you know what Jace, your right, thanks and I look forward to it,” Alec said that last part with a wink. Besides his sister, Jace was one person Alec was grateful for. After his fight and being coupe up in his apartment for two weeks, his sister forced him out for a night on the town. And that's where Alec met action star Jace Wayland, they hit it off immediately, after one drunken night together and a kiss in the morning, the relationship didn't seem right, yeah, it was some pretty great sex, but they learned that they were better off friends. It cliche when someone says, hey we can still be friends and usually it doesn't work out but in this case it did. After a talk and Alec breaking down in his arms, it brought them even closer and since then they had been inseparable.

Another person he was extremely grateful for, was his manager and go to person who he trusted with his life; Catarina Loss. “So Alec, you already know the schedule since we've gone over it fifty million times, do you have any more questions for me?” “Nope,” “Alright kid, were leaving here at 3:30, you're gonna be great!” “Thanks Cat.” Catarina only had a few clients but Alec was her biggest. When Alec first got into the business, he had met many agents, even some of the most sought after in the business but Catarina was the only one to make him feel like he mattered. Instead of telling him what he wanted to hear like all the others, she told him what he needed to hear. He loved that about her, the honesty, not to mention that Alec was her favorite, he was the only one allowed to call her Cat. “Alright I'll be outside if you need anything else.”

Tonight he's wearing Armani, black pants with a black stripe down the side and a black jacket with just a plane white dress shirt showing off his ripped figured and it topped with his signature chain across his hip. Alec was a simple man, he didn't need a lot of things, yeah it was nice to have the money, the cars and to be able to buy himself nice things every once and while. But if someone were to come along it take it all away, he'd be fine, as long as he had his music, his sister and friend, that's all he needed. “Hey Alec I'm all done here, I'll give you a few minutes to collect yourself, I'll see you outside.” “Thanks Clary”

**(Flashback-9 years ago)**

_“Alec, are you in here?” “Yeah I'm here,” “Are you alright?” “Yeah, I think, you think we should be doing this, I mean this is a big decision Magnus…” “What do we have waiting here for us and if we don't try now we never will, tomorrow you turn 18 then we're off to chase our dreams.” “You're right Mags, I guess I'm just a little scared, this place is the only home I've known, but I know with you by my side I can do anything.” “Damn straight and by this time in three years, you'll have your Grammy and I'll have my Oscar and we'll be right there by each other's side when we accept them.”_

**(Present)**

Pulled from his memories with a knock on the door, holding back his tears, “come in.” “Hey big bro, you…” noticing the sadness and the tears in his eyes, “Alec, what's wrong?” “Just my memories, you know Magnus and I always had big dreams and how we would be there for each other and now that the time has come, it's a little bittersweet.” “Oh Alec…” “This is so stupid, it's…” “No Alec, he was your best friend for a very long time and he betrayed you, it's ok to feel a little sad. But just remember that you have me and Jace, Clary and Catarina, and tonight is your night, just think about winning.” “Thanks Iz, what would I do without you,” “The juries still out on that…” with a playful punch to his sister arm, “ha ha ha, very funny.” With a wink, “so bro, you ready to rock the stage?” “Let's do this.” Iz was right, tonight's his night and he'll be damned if he's going to let anybody else ruin that, tonight's the night where all his dreams come true.

Alec never thought he be here, when he left home at 18 to pursue his music career, he thought he would just try for a year then go to college and get a normal job. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he be here, a successful musician on his way to the Grammys where he's nominated for six awards. He's still waiting for someone to pinch him so he can awake from this dream. But when he pulls up to Staples Center and gets out of his limo and hears the screams of fans and paparazzi he's knows that this real and he's never been more ready in his life.

Finally making his way through the sharks and inside, he's hit with coldness, which is good for the LA heat outside. “Hey guys I'm gonna go use the restroom, I'll see you inside.” “You need me to come with you, I know how you are in crowds,” “Nah, Jace, I'll be ok, thanks, I just need a moment to myself.” “Alright text me if you need anything.” With a smile that he hoped was assuring to his friend and sister he made his way to the restroom.

Making it to the restroom finally, getting away from all the good lucks, he makes sure the room is empty, then he locks the doors so no one can see the panic. If people come knocking well oh well, he just needed a moment to himself. Splashing some cold water on his face (thank god for waterproof makeup or Clary would kill him), he looked in the mirror and gave himself a little pep talk, “get it together Lightwood, you can do this, you can do this, I can do this.” With a smile in the mirror, “this is my goddamn night, I can do this.” A loud constant knock on the bathroom door brought him out of his thoughts, it appears their not going away anytime soon, which is ok because he's ready, he can do this.

When he opens the door, “alright alright damn, I'm com…” the words die on his tongue, when he's sees the man he didn't want to see till the end of the night; one Magnus Bane.


	3. And the Grammy goes to...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus' confrontation. Alec's night gets better.

There he was, the one person Magnus wanted to see more then anyone, but the main question was did Alec want to see him? The minute he was asking himself the look in Alec’s eyes went from surprised to hurt and then to anger and right then and there Magnus got his answer. “It's all yours” Alec said with a coldness that Magnus didn't recognize, Alec pushed past him leaving Magnus there dumbfounded. But before he could get away Magnus hoping his voice would come out strong, forced out “Alexander" but it didn't, it came out hoarse with a whiny desperation. Alec whipped his body around, “no, don't,” his voice stern, “you don't get to do that,” with his finger poking Magnus' chest, “you don't get to say anything, not tonight, tonight's about me so for once in your life just shut up.”

With that Alec turned on his heel and walked away leaving a broken hearted Magnus in his wake. Alec knew that he was harsh, but he didn't care, Magnus deserved it. Shit it took everything he had not to punch him in the face when he said his name like that. Alec was surprised his voice came out as even and stern as it did. Alec made his way back to his seat.

Izzy was getting worried about her brother right when she was about to get up to go check on him she saw him making his way down the isle. As he got closer she could see the anger in his eyes and wondered what could have happened to make her brothers mood change so drastically. Then in walked Magnus with red rimmed eyes and Izzy got her answer.

The minute Alec sat down, Izzy and Jace could feel him shaking, “Alec are you ok…” asked Izzy, “yeah man, your shaking.” And he was, he was so angry and hurt but more angry then anything that he hadn't recognized that he was shaking so bad, taking a deep breath in and out a few times and stealing a glance at Magnus, “yeah, yeah, I'm good.” Jace looking over to see what Alec was looking at, noticing it was Magnus, he spat out, “I'm gonna kill him.” Jace got up to move but Alec pulled him down, “no don't, it's not worth it, not tonight, tonight's too important.” Looking at Alec's pleading eyes, he sat down and took a deep breath in, “yeah you're right.” With a smile, Alec said “thanks but most importantly, thanks for always having my back.” And with that the conversation was over.

For the first time since he sat down he finally took notice to the people he was sitting next to and he was so happy. He had Jace to his right and his sister Izzy next to him, which he had to beg to even get her a seat. But being nominated for six awards he just said that he needed the two most important people in his life, which they caved to. Then to the left of him a good friend of his in the music world, Bea Miller sat next to him. They had worked together a couple times, she sang one of his most personal songs he ever wrote, being he couldn't sing it because every time he did he would cry.  So he put I Can't Breathe in his back pocket until the perfect person came around to sing it. That's when they met and she was perfect for it, he sat her down and told her all about the significance and what it represented and that she would be honored to let the world know how great of a song writer he was. After working with each other they had achieved a great friendship and have been close ever since, he even worked on other pieces of her music. Alec was the triple threat, a great singer, writer and composer. And the next thing they knew I Can't Breathe was also nominated for an award, Record of the Year.

Soon after the lights went down and the music hit the stage. Alec wouldn't admit it but, he had never been more nervous in his life. As the first twenty minutes were littered with performances it was finally time for the first award. He was actually having a good time but now that the first award come up that he was nominated for he was nervous, mostly because he just wanted to win so damn bad just to prove everyone wrong. Everyone who said he’d never make it in life he just wanted to say a big F You. And that's what he did, “…and the Grammy for Song of the Year goes to to ‘Dancing on My Own’ Alec Lightwood.” Alec was so nervous and lost in his thoughts that he never even noticed his name being called until his friends were pulling him up. Jace was the first to speak, “Alec you won, get up and go get your award.” Alec couldn't believe it, “Wait, I did,” “Yes big bro, now go.”

When Magnus heard Alec's name being called he couldn't be happier, if anyone deserved it, it was one Alec Lightwood. Even though he couldn't be next to him he still cheered him on. The man had been through a lot, no thanks to him, if the world owed anyone it was him.

Alec walked up the stairs praying not to trip, he always was clumsy person, he made it safely to the microphone, he took a deep breath, he didn't have anything prepared so he would just speak from the heart. “Wow,” he put his hand on his forehead and looked at the award, “this is crazy. You know I'm just a kid from a small Texas town and when I came out here when I was 18 I never expected to made anything out of my career. I thought I would give it a year then go to college and get some boring desk job somewhere," he said with a laugh and he'd be lying if he said he didn't get a kick out of the whole crowd laughing right along with him. "Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd be up here accepting this award. This is for my fans, friends and sister who stuck with me through it all, and to the people who said I'd never make anything out of my life, I thank you because without you I wouldn't be standing here and just remember to all the people out there chasing the same dreams. It doesn't matter who are or where you come from, all it takes is hard work. Thanks.”

As he walked away from the stage he let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. He was surprised he got that all out without stuttering. He had never felt better and if he didn't win again the rest of the night he would be okay because he had already felt like he won the world.

 


	4. I Can’t Breathe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More awards are given and Alec hits the stage.

Twenty minutes later Alec was dealt with another shock, they had run for Record of the Year he didn’t know that his life was about to completely change. After winning he wasn’t able to go back to his seat because of his performance, it was just going to be him and his piano, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous.

_“Please welcome to the stage staring in the upcoming action thriller Floor 7: Jace Wayland.”_

_“Our next performer has already won five Grammys tonight is nominated for one more including Album of the Year, he’s not only a great singer/songwriter but a great composer. He’s also one of my closest friends, singing his hit song Dancing On My Own which also won for Single of the Year. Please welcome Alec Lightwood.”_

The lights come on and it’s just one shining down on Alec, just him and the piano and it starts.

 

 

_Somebody said you got a new friend_  
But does she love you better than I can?  
And there's a big black sky over my town  
I know where you're at I bet she's around

_And yeah I know it's stupid  
But I just gotta see it for myself_

_I'm in the corner watching you kiss her_  
Oh, oh, oh  
And I'm right over here. Why can't you see me?  
Oh, oh, oh  
And I'm givin' it my all  
But I'm not the guy you're taking home  
Oh  
I keep dancing on my own

_I just wanna dance all night_  
And I'm all messed up, I'm so out of line  
Stilettos and broken bottles  
I'm spinning around in circles

_And I'm in the corner watching you kiss her_  
Oh, oh, oh  
And I'm right over here. Why can't you see me?  
Oh, oh, oh  
And I'm giving it my all  
But I'm not the guy you're taking home  
Oh  
I keep dancing on my own  
And oh, no, no

_So far away_  
But still so near  
The lights come on  
The music dies  
But you don't see me standing here  
I just came to say goodbye

_I'm in the corner watching you kiss her_  
Oh, oh, oh  
And I'm giving it my all  
But I'm not the guy you're taking home  
Oh  
I keep dancing on my own  
And oh, no

_Said, I'm in the corner watching you kiss her_  
Oh, no  
And I'm right over here. Why can't you see me?  
Oh, no  
And I'm giving it my all  
But I'm not the guy you're taking home  
Ooh  
And I keep dancing on my own

_So far away_  
But still so near  
The lights come on  
The music dies  
But you don't see me standing here

  
_“Ladies and Gentleman please welcome my good friend Bea Miller”_

Alec stays on the piano but now their joined by a string quartet, Alec hopes he can make it through without the tears.

 

 

_Somebody get me a hammer_  
Wanna break all the clocks and the mirrors  
And go back to a time that was different  
A time when I  
Didn't feel like there was something missing  
Now my body and mind are so distant  
Don't know how to escape from this prison

_How can I  
Free my mind?_

_Cause I can't breathe_  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe

_I can't breathe_

_How can I live in the moment_  
When my thoughts never feel like my own and  
Don't know how to admit that I'm broken

_How can I  
Be alright?_

_Cause I can't breathe_  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe

_I can't breathe_

_I can't breathe_  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe  
I can't breathe

 

 

 

As soon as Alec got back stage he broke down into his friends waiting arms, how relieved he was for Jace Wayland. Alec excused himself and went to the private bathroom backstage to collect himself. After a couple of minutes he left and Jace was waiting, “you ok?”

“Yes.” And That was the end of that, Jace knew he wasn’t but he was thankful that he left it for later. They made it back to their seats where Izzy was waiting, she gave him a congratulations and they took their seats hoping to enjoy the rest of the evening.

The rest of the show went by pretty fast and Alec had a good time but it was now time to give out the biggest award of the night and Alec wanted it, he wanted it bad. He was being greedy for once in his life and it felt good.

 

 

_“Please welcome to the stage presenting the last award of the even, staring in the upcoming film Manipulation which he not only wrote but help produced, Magnus Bane.”_

The applause cleared out, _“Thanks, hope everyone’s had a good evening, the nominees in this last category all come from different genres but they all have two things in common, their all fantastic performers and are nominated for Album of the Year, here are the nominees...”_

 

Alec didn’t hear anything else but turned to his sister, “Thanks Izzy, for being there for me no matter what.”

She smiled, “your welcome big brother.”

_“...and the Grammy for Album of the year goes to...”_

Alec probably along with everyone else in the audience heard a small gasp, Magnus turned the envelope around.

_“Alec Lightwood: Dancing on my Own.”_

Alec was stunned, he didn’t expect it and he wanted to make sure he heard that right and when his sister pulled him out of his seat and hugged him, “I won...”

“You did hermano, now go get your award.”

He smiled the hugged Jace and made his way up to the stage, Magnus didn’t expect it but Alec hugged him and whispered into his ear, “you look good.” He took the Grammy out of his hand and walked to the microphone leaving a stunned Magnus.

“Holy shit,” the crowd laughed, “oooppps sorry, actually no I’m not, what a crazy evening, to say that this was the best night of my life would be an understatement.” There was another laugh from the crowd and a few tears escaped from his eyes, “wow,” he released a breath, “this album was two years in the making. It was written after a very hard time in my life and I wasn’t even going to record these songs because they were very personal and some I couldn’t even get through without getting emotional, but there’s only one person to thank for this at this point and that’s my sister. She stood by me no matter what, she stayed through the good times and the bad times. She encouraged me to keep fighting and for that I will be forever grateful for. And everyone else you should thank her too because without her we wouldn’t have had the amazing work of art. Thank you, you guys have a wonderful evening.”

He turned around and saw a Magnus Bane who was an emotional wreck, little tiny black rivers were running down his cheeks. At this moment he now knew that this entire album was about him and out of the three he’s put out this was the most emotional draining one he’s ever produced. They walked off the stage and he was hit with a ton of congratulations but he couldn’t take his eyes off of Magnus and Magnus couldn’t take his eyes off of Alec. Their eye contact was broken when Alec was being pulled away to take pictures but not before he whispered into Magnus’ ear, “you and I need to talk.” He saw Magnus nod his head and he walked away but he felt his phone vibrate, when he looked at it it was a text from Magnus, “congratulations, you deserved it.” He smiled at the text message and sent a thank you back and put his phone away, his night was only just beginning.

 

 

 


End file.
